Thanks for sharing your draft land acknowledgement of the Indigenous territories of where you were born and work now in Ontario and your gratitude for being accepted as a long-term visitor there.
I also really appreciate the learning and authentic feeling I see shining through in your acknowledgement that your (our) own ancestors are also complicit in the mistreatment of Indigenous peoples - despite also having suffered oppression in their homelands. It might be an idea to include something about that in future versions of your acknowledgement.
I also think it's good to keep a sense of shared value for social justice alive as this supports a perspective that we're on a reconciliation learning journey together. And in the land acknowledgement, I think a good way to demonstrate our own accountability to this value is to open with a clear recognition of the Indigenous lands where you are and then follow with the cultural self-location.